Sunday, October 28, 2007

Karaoke Night

Before we left for karaoke, I asked Shelly if she wouldn't mind waiting in the house for a couple minutes, I wanted to talk to Travis. I told him that I was concerned about his relationship with Shelly. "Is everything really ok?"

"Everything is fine Tanman," Travis replied.

"Really? Because nothing looked fine upstairs a while ago." Travis rolled his eyes at me. "Don't do that!" I snapped at him. "You think it's alright for you and Shelly to behave that way towards each other? Do you really want the boys to think it's fine to yell and scream at women? Or even their mother?"

"My boys are just fine Tanner."

"Bullshit! They aren't fine, you and Shelly aren't fine, nothing is fine if you are screaming at her like that. And hello! But I did hear her say that you scare her when you act like that, so that tells me that tonight wasn't the first time it has happened."

Travis crossed his arms and stared off into space. "Things aren't fine Travis, whatever is going on has changed you into a man that I'm not proud to call my brother. What happened upstairs scared me too."

"Pussy," Travis muttered.

"Fuck you!" I yelled at him. "Fuck you, you arrogant prick! You haven't seen the result of a temper like that, you weren't there the morning that I came home and saw Sara laying on my bed, one punch away from being a corpse. Don't fucking call me a pussy because I'm scared that one day that will be Shelly, not Sara who looks like a fucking punching bag."

"I don't hit my wife!" He yelled at me.

"For now," I yelled back.

"Fuck you," Travis replied. "I'm not a wife beater and I never will be! Just because Shelly and I argue doesn't mean that I'm a violent fucker! I know better than that!"

"Yeah?" I raised a brow. "I thought you knew better than to treat Shelly like crap too, but you have proven me wrong a lot in this last couple weeks." I turned to head back inside to tell Shelly I was ready to go. "You need help," I threw over my shoulder. "Before it's too late."

I feel that it's my fault that the night seemed ruined before it started. Travis and Shelly were happy when they walked out of his old room but there was no way that I could let what happened go. I did see Sara when Shelly pulled me into my room, scared of the man she married. If that makes me a pussy for being scared for her, then fuck it! I'm a fucking pussy! I don't care!

Neither one of us were in a great mood when we walked into the club that night. Shelly was confused as to what happened to change the mood and neither one of us were about to explain it to her.

"Were we supposed to meet Sara?" Shelly asked as she looked around the crowded club.

"She doesn't know he's coming," Travis told her. "He told her he was babysitting tonight."

"I told her I would show up if I could," I told both of them. "So here I am and there she is," I smiled as I saw her walking from somewhere to the right of where we stood. "Excuse me."

I left Travis and Shelly to fend for themselves, I wasn't too concerned about it, I was sure they would find their way over to wherever Sara was going, or find someone they knew to chat with.

Sara had no clue that I was close at all. In fact, she jumped when I came up along side her and wrapped my arm around her waist. "Hey there baby," I kissed her cheek while she stood there shocked.

She just stood there, jaw wide open, staring at me. "Sara?" My finger touched her chin, gently pressing upwards to close her mouth. "Maybe later I'll take you up on that offer," I joked to get a reaction from her.

"Yeah right," she slapped my hand away with a laugh. "What are you doing here? I thought you were babysitting?"

"So did I," I explained to her how I messed up on the day. When I was done explaining, she squealed, "Oh Tanner!" She threw her arms around my neck, "I'm so glad you are here!"

"That's better," I told her but didn't get to enjoy her pressed against me, she pulled away as quickly as she threw herself at me.

"Come," she tugged on my hand, "Billy and everyone else is over here!"

A few minutes later, I was seated on a stool across the table from Billy and his...date? guy? I have no idea what he was...I just know I finally met the Cal that they were always talking about. I'll be damned if I didn't know him already, we were friends in school. We took a little walk down memory lane while Sara and Billy listened in. At one point he leaned in and whispered something to Billy and I had to look away.

"What are you doing?" Sara hissed.

"Nothing," I told her. "Don't look at me like that!"

"I thought you didn't care?" She looked hurt.

"I don't," I looked at Billy and Cal who seemed disappointed. "I don't! It's just that I never knew! We were friends how long? And man you were never without female company." I shrugged, "I can't help it that I'm shocked."

"It's not like I could just come out and say it Tanner, I didn't want to accept it back then. People like Luke would've made my life hell, so I did want I had to do, I pretended it wasn't true."

I told him that I was sorry if I had anything to do with him thinking that he couldn't tell me. "I'm pretty understanding," I told him. "At least I think I am." I looked at Billy but it was Cal who spoke.

"I heard that you were, Billy has spoken about you and Sara a lot."

Soon every one's attention was focused on the stage as Frankie, the lady that hosts karaoke every week took the stage. Before kicking the night off with a song, she introduced herself and the band.

"I'm so nervous," Sara, who had been standing next to me after insisting I sit on her stool, turned her attention from the stage. "I feel like I'm going to get sick."

"Come here," I turned towards her, she came to stand between my legs. "You'll do great."

"I don't know Tanner."

"Of course you will, you've done this a million times."

"Yeah," she rested her ass against my leg. "But you weren't there then." She made a face and pressed her hand against her stomach.

"I'm just the same as any other person in this room Sara."

"No," she shook her head, making the 'I think I'm going to get sick' face again. "You aren't the same."

"Sara," my hand slipped over hers as it rested on her stomach. "You'll do great, you'll see. Just like everyone else in here, I'm really looking forward to hearing you sing."

She looked at me, as if she was going to say something. Her mouth opened but no words came out. After a couple minutes, I started to wonder what she was thinking as she stared at me. I went to ask her but the words seemed to disappear when she lifted her hand to my cheek; her fingers shaking slightly as they stroked my skin.

Like every other time she touched me, a warm feeling spread throughout my body. I wanted to pull her onto my lap and kiss the nervousness out of her mind; I had a couple things she could focus her attention on.

But I didn't, I held back, I wanted see what she was thinking - what she wanted to do.

Her fingers were on my cheek but her eyes seemed focused on my mouth. "Sara?" Her eyes jumped to mine, her fingers stilled. "You didn't have to stop."

She smiled, her fingers moving against my cheek again and soon her eyes were focused on my mouth again.

"Sa....mmm" her thumb brushed against my lip as I went to speak.

"Yes?" She raised a brow but her eyes remained on my lips.

"It was nothing," I told her as I slipped both my arms around her waist, linking my fingers together as my hands met over her hip. So much for waiting for her to make another more.

"Tanner," her hand dropped to my shoulder. I thought she was going to pull away but she surprised me, she turned her body towards me, coming as close as she could as she linked her fingers behind my neck. "I'm so happy you are here."

"Me too," I leaned forward, kissing the tip of her nose.

She giggled nervously and tilted her head downwards. I was so sure that I blew it, I was about to let her go when she suddenly looked up at me. I swear she said 'you can do it,' I was about to ask her about it when she leaned forward, pressing her lips against mine.

But before I could react, before I could feel her lips move against mine, she was gone. She had pulled completely away from me so fast.

"Sara," I wanted to ask her what the hell she was playing at when I realized that everyone at the table was quiet. One look in Sara's direction told me why.

The bastard stood mere inches from her with her arm held firmly in his hand.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Extreme Make Out?

I had just returned to my room after having a shower when I heard the doorbell ring. My parents were home, so I knew I didn't have to run to see who was there. But when I heard a rush of voices, I pulled on a pair of sweats and made my way down stairs.

"Mommy and daddy said that we were sleeping here tonight grandma!" I watched from the living room as Kyle launched himself at mom.

"That's right," mom hugged him. "Your parents are going out to karaoke."

The look on Travis' face when mom said 'karaoke' was hilarious! He looked like he just got a whiff of something rancid.

I chuckled.

He heard me.

"Oh fuck!" I spun around in an attempt to get away from him, he was giving me the same look me always gave me before he tried to kick my ass.

"That's right! Run fucker!"

I heard mom gasp and scold Travis for his language as I took the steps two at a time. My goal was to get to my room before he caught up with me.

I didn't make it, he fast for an old fucker. Or maybe I'm just that out of shape. Like his son a few minutes earlier, Travis leapt forward, tackling me to the ground just before I got to my room.

"You just had to say something to mom and dad, didn't you?" He punched me in the arm. "You couldn't leave it alone? I told you I didn't want to go listen to a bunch of drunks singing badly!" He punched me again. "Now, instead of relaxing at home, I have to take Shelly out two nights in a row! You're such a little prick!"

"You don't have to do anything!"

Travis stopped in mid punch again, his eyes went wide, he looked down at me, I pointed behind him. He turned slowly to see his wide standing behind him, visibly upset.

"Shelly!" Travis pulled away from me, sitting back on his feet as he stared up at her.

"You're the little prick!" She snapped as she came towards us. I thought she was going to hit him, I really did. I think he did too because he flinched when she got close. But she didn't, she stormed pass the both of us and slammed the door shut.

"Hey!" I stared at the closed door. "That's my room!" I jumped up, tried the knob but it didn't move, she locked it. "Travis! Fix this! Get your wife out of my room!"

"Fix this?" He pushed off the floor. "How the hell do you want me to fix this? She's crazy! She knows I hate karaoke! I hate it!" He yelled at the closed door.

"I hate hockey!" Shelly yelled back. "But I go to the stupid games with you! I sat on the sidelines and cheered for you when you played!"

"Hockey more entertaining than karaoke!"

"Fine! Go home and watch your game," Shelly screamed. "I'm going out with Tanner!"

"Like hell you are!" Travis replied. "You aren't going anywhere with my brother!"

"Yes I am!" Shelly answered, opening the door. "I'm going and I'm going to have fun. And you know why?"

Travis didn't say anything.

Shelly let out a frustrated growl, "He's a better man that you will ever be!" She grabbed my hand and pulled me into my room, slamming the door behind me.

"Shelly!" Travis banged on the door. "Open this door!"

"Get dressed Tanner," Shelly shoved me towards my closet. "I want to go right now, I can't be around that man any longer."

"Tanner! You son of a bitch! I swear to God, if you lay one hand on my wife, I'll kill you!" My door was just barely holding its own under the strenght of Travis' pounding.

"What?" I glanced from the vibrating door to Shelly. "What??" I asked again in total disbelief.

"Your brother is insane!" Shelly screamed the last word.

Some where in all the screaming, mom must have come upstairs. "Travis! What are you doing? You are scaring the boys!"

The door stopped moving, Travis wasn't yelling anymore. I could still hear his voice but I couldn't make out what he was saying to mom.

"Tanner?" Mom's light knocks sounded on the door a couple minutes later. "Can you please open the door?"

Shelly didn't want me to open the door but I was done with this, I couldn't understand how something like this could happen. I knew my brother and Shelly didn't always see eye to eye but fuck! screaming at each other like that? When the hell did that start? Where was I that I didn't noticed that there was something seriously wrong? I knew Travis was a stubborn, insensitive jerk but this irrational behavior? This wasn't something I was familiar with.

It got me thinking about Sara and the bastard. Was this how their relationship started? Was my brother one step away from being the bastard?

I opened the door. Mom stood before me with a worried look on her face, she asked Shelly if she was ok. I didn't pay attention to Shelly's reply, my attention was on my brother as he stood with his hands in his pockets and his head lowered to the ground. He was shaking.

"What was that?" I asked him as I ventured closer.

"Nothing," he remained transfixed on the floor. "I'm fine."

"No you aren't," Shelly came over to us. "You scare me when you get like that Travis."

"And you purposely push my buttons," Travis lifted his head to look at her. "You know I don't like karaoke."

Shelly let out a shaky breath. "I know," she admitted. "But I hoped that you would want to spend time with me, doing stuff I like." She glanced at me, "Tanner doesn't like it either but he's going for Sara because she loves it."

"I'm not my brother," he snapped. "I can't be that much of a pussy if I tried."

"HEY!" I glared at him.

"I'm sorry Tanman," Travis smirked. "You have to admit, you are a pussy."

"Fuck you," I walked away from them. "I'm getting ready to go out, you two can do whatever you want."

From the time I left them standing in the hall until the time I finally figured that they were no longer in the hall, forty five minutes had passed. The hall was deserted, I didn't know where anyone was and I didn't care, I headed towards the stairs.

I heard a door open behind me. "Tanner! Wait for us!" I turned to see Travis and Shelly emerge from Travis' old room, they were looking a little...oh fuck it! They looked like they had sex.

"Can we catch a ride with you?" Shelly asked as she led Travis over to where I was.

I think I nodded, I was too shocked to say anything as they started down the stairs hand in hand.

"Come on Tanman," Travis smiled at me over his shoulder. "Sara is waiting."

Monday, October 22, 2007

Checking Plans

"What are you doing this weekend?" It was Thursday night - actually Friday morning at 3am - Billy and I were on our way back to the staffroom for lunch. "Sara and I were thinking about going to the bar tonight, she might be singing again. You should come along."

"I can't," I told him as we rounded the corner by infants, Sara was walking out of the department, I smiled when she stopped to wait for us. "I have plans."

"Come on Tanner, this is the second week in a row you've passed up the chance to see Sara on stage."

"You think I don't know that?" I glanced at him. "Trust me, I'd rather spend the night with her than with the boys but I can't get out of it. They are looking forward to it, they've already planned a bunch of things for us to do."

"Boys?"

I nodded, my attention on Sara as we got closer. "Yeah Cody and Kyle."

"What about your nephews?" Sara asked as she fell into step beside me.

"I was just telling Billy that I made plans tonight with them."

"Oh," she smiled but I heard the disappointment in her voice.

"I'm sorry," I told her. "I wish I could get out of this but I can't, my brother's marriage could be on the line." Sara shot me a questioning look. I told her how Travis was taking Shelly out for dinner and they were spending the night in a hotel.

"Wow," Sara sighed wishfully. "That sound really romantic, Shelley is going to love it."

"That's the idea," I told her.

"I guess I can't be too disappointed that you won't be at the bar tonight then," she said as we sat down at our usual table.

"Nope," I smiled. "It's out of my control."

"So you would be there if you didn't have to watch your nephews?"

"Of course I would. You wouldn't be able to keep me away."

Little did I know that things wouldn't go as I thought they would when I got to Travis' Friday night.

"What are you doing here?" Was how Travis greeted me.

"What do you mean?" I pushed passed him. "You conned me into watching the boys tonight."

"Like hell I did," Travis followed me into his living room.

"You did," I snapped at him. "You are supposed to be taking Shelly out tonight, why aren't you ready to go?" I realized the house was very quiet. "Where are the boys? Where is Shelly? Did something happen?"

"No, nothing happened. Shelly is still working and the boys are down the street playing with the neighbours." Travis dropped onto the couch. "And you Tanman are completely fucked up, I'm not taking Shelly out until tomorrow night."

"Screw you," I stared down at him. "It's tonight, I should know, I made the damn reservations for you!"

"It's not tonight," he insisted.

"It is!"

"It's not!"

"It is!"

"It's not!" He got up, suddenly looking worried. "Fucker you better not have messed this up! Shelly always works late on Fridays! Why the hell would I say Friday?"

"You said Friday."

"Fuck you, I didn't!"

"You did! You said the 20th and today is -"

"The 19th!"

"What?" I stared at him. Was it the 19th? I had no idea what day it was, working nights was messing me up.

Travis cursed. "Don't fucking scare me like that! Shelly is really looking forward to this! Tell me you made the reservations for the right fucking day!"

I hesitated, I wasn't sure if I said the date or the day when I called the hotel.

"Fuck!" Travis stomped out of the room. "I should've known better than to trust you to help me!"

"Fuck you!" I went after him. "I shouldn't have to help you plan a night with your wife! Why the hell does Shelly even stick around? You are inconsiderate, needy and a lazy son of a bitch! How did you even get her to agree to marry you?"

"Shut up!" Travis snapped as he pulled the phone book from the cabinet, flipping to the back of the book to the yellow pages.

"Why should I shut up? Your wife wanted you to make plans for a special night with her and you couldn't even do that! You suckered me into helping you! God you are pathetic!"

"Me?" He shook his head as he dialed a number. "I'm not the one still living with mom and dad! Hey! Hi," he glared up at me as he asked the person on the phone about his reservation. When he hung up, he punched me in the arm.

"What the hell was that for?"

"For scaring that crap out of me! You made the reservation for tomorrow night like you were supposed too!"

"Oh," I shrugged. "Sorry?"

He punched me again. "Fucker," he walked out of the kitchen. "So what are you going to do tonight?" He asked me when I joined him in the living room again. "Hook up with Sara?"

I laughed at his change in attitude. It was always like that, we would fight and then it was like nothing happened. It drove our parents crazy when we were younger, they thought we lost our minds.

"She has dinner plans with some friends but she's supposed to be singing at the bar later tonight."

"Karaoke?" I nodded, Travis cringed. "I don't envy you man. Shelly is always bugging me to take her out for that crap."

"Why don't you?" He shot he a dirty look. "No Travis think about it. Shelly is expecting tomorrow, so it's not much of a surprise but if she comes home and you have plans to take her out to karaoke tonight, she'll be shocked."

"No fucking way!" Travis exclaimed. "I'm not about to give up a perfectly good Friday night to go listen to people butcher some over played song. You are on your own fucker. I'm not that crazy."

"Ok," I shrugged. "But if you did, I know that mom and dad aren't doing anything tonight. They did seem a little upset when I told them that I was watching the boys..."

"No way Tanner! I'm not taking Shelly out for that."

"Ok," I left it at that. "Well I guess if I'm not babysitting, I'm out of here."

I headed back home, surprising my parents when I walked in the door as they were sitting down for dinner. Mom grabbed another plate and handed it to me while I filled them in on why I wasn't at Travis'. I told them about my plans for the night and hinted that Shelly would love to go too but Travis wouldn't go with her. My parents loved Shelly, probably more than they loved Travis, although they would never admit that one.

"Travis should take her," mom said. "Lord knows she's done many things she didn't want to do for him."

"I know but what can you do?" Inside I was laughing, I had a feeling I would see Travis at the bar that night.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

No Isn't The Right Answer

Travis and Shelly are crazy. And I'm just as crazy because I said yes. That's right, when my brother called me this morning, he didn't really care how I was doing, how work was going or if Sara has been around lately. No, he's not that type of guy, he only asks these things when he wants something.

And boy did he want something.

"Shelly has been bugging me about taking her out," he told me. "Without the boys."

"Without the boys?" I faked surprised. Shelly has been after him for a couple months now to show her some attention, he's been ignoring it as if she'll suddenly stop wanting to do stuff with him. I wanted to tell him that she'll stop alright...when she leaves his sorry ass.

"Yeah!" Travis exclaimed as if it was the most ridiculous thing he ever heard in his life. "You know what she wants to do? Go to a freaking hotel for the night! What the hell do I want to go to a hotel in my own town for? My bed is just as comfortable!"

I laughed, "I think you are missing the point fucker."

"Don't call me fucker...fucker."

"Don't be stupid, take your wife out this weekend before she realizes that she would be better off without you."

"I'm the best damn thing that ever happened to that woman!"

My brother is such an ass...all the time. I really don't know how he ever got Shelly to marry him. She must've been stoned or something. "Travis you are lucky she sticks around. Take her out, do whatever she wants and don't do something stupid to fuck it all up."

"Screw you," he muttered.

"If you play your cards right, you could be 'screwing' your wife all weekend."

"Fu - wait, what?" Totally clueless.

So I spelt it out for him. "Shelly wants you to take her out without the boys, right?"

"I told you that already, fuck you are forgetful."

"Shut up asswipe."

"Make me f-"

"Travis! Fuck! I'm trying to tell you that Shelly is probably thinking of a romantic weekend with you which, if you don't fuck it up, means she's thinking about sex."

"No way!" Travis laughed and then stopped. "Are you serious?"

"How is it possible that you are even married?" I shook my head. "Yes you dumb fuck, your wife is probably planning some kind of romantic evening that she wants to end in sex."

"Alright!"

I rolled my eyes. "No, not alright. Don't let her plan it."

"What? Are you fucking kidding me? I'm going to get laid this weekend and you are telling me not to do it? Tanman, you really need to get head or something. Do you need me to lend you money for a whore? I could do that for you, being the nice guy I am."

"Fuck you," I snapped. "I only told you not to let her plan it! She doesn't want to plan it, she wants you to plan it and she wants it to be romantic and all that crap. You know candles and music and -"

"Fuck Tanman! Are you going gay or what?"

"Plan the fucking weekend Travis! Shelly may end up doing something 'special' for you to show her appreciation, if you play your cards right."

Silence.

"Travis?"

"Youhavetohelpme!"

"What?"

"Plan this!" He snapped. "You have to help me, you know I don't do this romantic bullshit." It was true, my brother's idea of 'romantic moments' is not grabbing Shelly's tits every time he kisses her.

"Fine. What does Shelly like?"

Travis did a horn ball chuckle before saying, "Well she loves it when I lick her..."

"If you continue with that sentence you are on your own."

"What? You asked what she liked, I was just telling you..."

"What would put her in the mood dumb ass, not how to get her off!"

Travis had trouble coming up with some mood setters on his own but when I asked him specific 'does she like...' questions he knew the answers to them. He knows his wife really well, he just lacks the initiative to carry out the things to make a 'special' night for her.

After I gave him a few ideas and some numbers of people to help him carry out those ideas, he said he had to run and before he hung up, he said. "Thanks for agreeing to watch the boys."

"What?" I damn near jumped out of my chair when he said that. "Travis I didn't - fuck!" He had hung up on me, I was talking to the dial tone.

I called him back and we fought for about a half hour on whether or not I was being a dick for not wanting to watch my nephews for one night.

Apparently I am a dick. But a dick who reluctantly agreed to babysit on his weekend off.

Now, if I only knew how to watch kids.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Freeze Frame

Today is like Christmas for me! No, nothing special happened with Sara, if it did that would be like Christmas and my birthday all rolled into one!

No, today is the one day where I actually waited for the department managers to come in. Today was the one day I hung around the store to actually buy something. If you didn't know, today is Transformers day!

I can not tell you how excited I am to see this movie. If you can recall, I tried to go see it with Sara when it came out this summer but we ended up playing arcade games until the place closed for the night. So I haven't seen it and it's killing me, it looked so awesome in the trailers!

I'm not a Transformers fan, I don't know the story, I didn't follow the show. I played with Transformers as a kid but I had no idea at the time what they were or that there was a huge cult following with it came to them. Hell, I didn't even know there was a freaking cartoon until a couple years ago! It's a little hard to explain how excited you can get for a movie that you have no idea about.

But fuck was I excited to get a copy!

At seven the department managers come in and at seven I normally run out the door. This morning I was circling the unopened displays for the movie, waiting for the Electronics manager to come over so I could get a copy.

I'll be damn if she wasn't late!

At 7:15, I was damn near bouncing. I wanted to hunt her down and beat her for not being there so I could get my copy before I went home.

"Come on," Sara tugged on my hand. "Let's go grab some breakfast and come back just as the store opens, they have to be out then!"

"But...but..." I stared at the non descript cardboard box surrounding the display as it blocked me from getting my hands on one. "What if they sell out?"

She laughed, "Tanner they won't sell out first thing! Come on," she motioned for me to follow her as she started for the front of the store.

I ended up following her, I didn't really want to wait until the store opened, I wanted to go home immediately and watch it but breakfast with Sara? I could put of Transformers for a little while to be with her.

Breakfast was great, I think the other customers were a little confused by us ordering burgers and fries but it was more like supper time for us, not breakfast. We talked about little things, I'm still finding out stuff about her like, this morning, she told me that when she was a little girl, she would climb up to the top of the biggest tree in her backyard. She would spend hours up there, watching the neighbours and writing or drawing what she saw.

"Do you still climb the tree?"

She shook her head, "No, I fell out of it when I was 15 and suddenly it didn't seem like so much fun anymore."

When we were finished eating, we went back to work. Sara said she needed to grab some things for her mom, so she went off to do that while I ran - ok, I didn't really run - to Electronics and bought the movie.

I tried to talk Sara into coming home with me by saying she owed me a movie but she said she couldn't, that she had stuff to do at home.

If you are counting...and I am....it's been 12 days since Sara has come home with me. 12 days since we really hung out.

I don't count the time I went to her house...

Fuck! I guess I still have to finish that story. Damn Transformers made me forget about it!

Where was I?

Oh yeah...

"Tanner?" Sara gasped as I came flying around the corner of her house, ready to cause injury to the bastard for even daring to be around her after all he did.

"Where is he?" I looked around frantically.

Sara frowned, "Where is who?" She glanced at the chick that got out of her car before looking back at me. "What are you doing here Tanner?"

"Tanner?" The chick came bouncing up, gawking at us. "This is Tanner?" I swear her jaw was scrapping the ground as Sara nodded. "Oh my GOD! Yum!"

"Becca!" There was a red tinge to Sara's cheeks as her eyes widen.

"What?" Becca smiled. "You told me he was cute but...mmmm," She was checking me out. "He's hot!"

"BECCA!" Red looks good on Sara but I'm sure she was wishing for the ground to open up and take her. She tried to pretend that she wasn't embarrassed as she turned to ask me why I was there. "Is something wrong?"

"That's the bastard's truck," I pointed to the street. "What the hell is he doing here?"

"Tanner..." Sara grimaced as she shot a look to Becca.

"What?" I had all these thoughts rushing through my head, and one of them was an image of the two of them back together which made my blood boil. "If he hurts you again Sara, he's a dead man!"

"Tanner!" Sara's eyes narrowed. "Stop it right now!"

"Why? He's a bastard and he didn't deserve you. I won't let him hurt you again."

"I don't think..." she glanced at Becca once again before asking if we could just talk about it later.

I shook my head, "Why is his truck here? Have you seen him?"

Sara crossed her arms over her chest...and yes, even though I was angry about the bastard, my eyes shifted downwards. "No, I haven't seen him Tanner."

"Then why is -"

"Hey," Becca threw her hand out in front of me. "I never introduced myself. I'm Becca," she smiled up at me. "The bastard's little sister."

"Wha..." I noticed Sara was nodding her head. I started to stumble over my words as I went to apologize.

"No," Becca stopped me. "I happen to agree with you, I love my brother but he is a bastard and he didn't deserve Sara. I don't know how she put up with all his crap for so long, I would've kicked him in the nuts years ago!"

"I'm home for Thanksgiving," she continued. "I told Ken I needed his truck to run some errands. I drove here in his truck. Not him, he's not here so you can relax."

I felt like a complete ass.

"Sara," Becca gave her a hug. "I'm so glad we got to hang out for a little while, I was afraid that you wouldn't want to see me now."

"Of course I want too," Sara hugged her back. "We were friends before Ken, I don't see why it would make a difference now."

"It shouldn't," Becca stated but there seemed to be something hidden in her tone, like the bastard not liking her talking to Sara still. "It was nice to finally met you," she said to me. "I have to go, it's a long drive back to school." She started to walk towards the truck. "I'll call you soon Sara."

She was about to get into the truck when she stopped and called out to Sara. "Maybe you should get Tanner to help you with that little 'problem' we were talking about earlier, he looks like he would be more than willing!"

Sara couldn't even look at me after Becca said that.

"So?" I rocked back and forth from my heels to my toes, my hands were shoved deep into the front pockets of my jeans. "I made an ass out of myself, didn't I?"

Sara chuckled, "Yeah," she nudged me. "A big one."

"I freaked when I saw his truck."

She nodded, "I know, I did too. I couldn't even get in it when Becca said she wanted me to go with her to the stores; that's why we took my car."

I threw an arm around her shoulders. "I'm sorry I reacted like I did."

"It's ok," she turned, wrapping both her arms around my waist. "You're a guy, you aren't expected to think before you act."

"Hey!"

"But I'll let you make it up to me," she smiled up at me.

I raised a brow, "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," she looked at her car. "You can help me with some stuff."

Nice moment...isn't it? Being close, talking, enjoying the day.

Then I had to ruin the moment....

"The thing that Becca mentioned?"

Sara went red. And she pushed away from me. "I'm going to kill her" she muttered as she walked towards her car.

I killed the moment! Fuck! Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that moment back? I tried for the hour that I was at her place but nothing I did came close to us being back in that place. Sara didn't freeze me out, she just didn't get that cozy with me again.

Maybe I should learn to keep my mouth shut.

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Who Said You Could Come Back?

I got pretty fucking hammered last Friday night when I went out with my brother and his friends. All the hope I had of meeting up with Sara and Billy at the club where she was going to sing vanished in round after round of godawful shooters and beer. In the early morning hours, Travis and I drunkenly stumbled into his his house, slurring words to some song, not really knowing what we were singing but enjoying every second of it.

"Shelly!" Travis yelled out as his drunk ass missed the couch he was trying to collapse onto. "Baby I fell on my ass!" He started to laugh, "I fell on my ass," he repeated when he spotted me staring at the matching love seat, the concept of sitting was beyond my grasp at that moment.

"Hey Fucker!" A cushion came flying towards me, it missed me by a mile but it startled me. "Come help me up," Trav laughed from his spot on the floor. "Fucker."

"Screw you," I mumbled. "I'm trying to sit here!"

"Shelly! Woman where the fuck are you?"

Tempting fate, I leaned forward, cursing the love seat for not moving to help me out at all. "Fuck!" I swore as I lost my balance and fell face first into the wall behind the love seat. "Fuck me!" I groaned, the pictures on the wall above me rankled and for a moment, I thought they would attack me for disturbing them.

While I was straightening myself out as much as I could on the love seat, Travis had rolled onto his side, attempting to get up. "Shelly!" He groaned. "Do you think she's ignoring me?"

"No," I replied. "She left you."

"Fuck you!" Another cushion came flying my way, it hit the lamp next to me before falling to the floor. "She wouldn't do that! Shelly! Baby! Come help me!"

There was no response.

"Fuck you," he slurred, I wasn't sure if it was directed at me or Shelly.

Silence settled over the living room, Travis had fallen back onto his back once again and I managed to lay on my back in the love seat with one leg over the arm and the other hanging over the side.

"I'm so fucking horny," Trav groaned, breaking the silence. "Shelly!"

"Shut up!" It was my turn to toss a cushion, it landed at his side. "She's not here."

"Where the fuck is she?"

"I don't fucking know, she's your wife."

Silence.

I closed my eyes, trying really hard not to let the fact that the room was rushing around me like a top, get to me.

The next thing I know, I'm being blinded. "What the....fuck!" I grabbed my head in my hands, hoping that would relive some of the pressure inside but of course it didn't. "Turn off the fucking light," I snapped.

But the light didn't go away. I attempted to open my eyes. It was morning. "Fucking sun," I tried to turn onto my side to cover my face, instead I found myself greeting the floor with a thud!

"Son of a bitch!"

I stayed there, facing down in Trav's carpet until the odor coming from it was too much, I felt like I was going to barf. I'm not sure how I did it, but I managed to push myself up off the carpet and onto my hands and knees.

My whole body ached as I shakily held that position while I scanned the living room and found Travis passed out, still on the floor in front of the couch although it looked like he attempted to get on the couch at one point - all the cushions were scattered around him.

A half hour later, I fell into the guest bed. I was going to go back to sleep when I spotted the phone sitting on the night table next to the bed. In my hangover clumsiness, I took a couple swipes for the receiver, knocking over the box of tissues and the photos in the table before my hand circles around what I wanted.

Sara's mom answered the phone, she hesitated but went to get Sara after I managed to mumble coherently into the phone that I wanted to speak with her.

"Hello?" She sounded so bright and cheerful.

I grunted.

"Hello? Tanner?"

"Not so loud," I whispered.

"Are you drunk?"

I nodded and groaned.

"Tanner?"

"Mmmm?" I closed my eyes, sleep was tugging on me.

She sighed. "What did you call me for? Did you need something?"

"Mmmm," I smiled. "Yes."

"What did you need?" She asked after a brief hesitation.

"Come over."

"Tanner I can't, I have -"

"Just for a little?"

I spent ten minutes trying to convince her that coming over would be in her best interest but in the end she told me she couldn't. "I really wish I could," she said as her mom called out to her, asking her if she was ready to go. "I have to go. I'll see you later."

Later, when the pounding in my head had ceased enough to function, I got up and went in search of something to eat. I tried calling her that night to see if she was free but there wasn't any answer at her house.

I spent all Saturday with my brother, recovering from the night before.

Sunday afternoon, after Shelly and the boys came back from visiting her grandparents, I swung by Sara's place but her car wasn't home but there was a red truck sitting on the street outside her house.

My heart leapt into my throat at the sight of the bastard's truck sitting there so innocently at the curb. I swerved across the street, almost hitting an oncoming car. I didn't even bother to shut off my car, I just slammed it into park. Jumping out, I ignored the curses from the driver of the car I almost hit as I raced to the front door.

I knocked and called out to Sara but there was no answer. I went around the house, peeking in all the windows and checking the doors but I couldn't get in and there was no sign anyone was even home.

While I was in the back of the house looking around, I heard a car coming down the street but I didn't pay any attention to it until I heard doors slam and Sara's laughter.

"Tanner?" Sara gasped as I came flying around the corner of her house, ready to cause injury to the bastard for even daring to be around her after all he did.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Moody Blues

The second he told me to get off, I jumped back. My mind was going a million miles a second, I couldn't help but wonder if he thought I was hitting on him or if he was pulling my leg; on all that is holy, I swear I was hoping he was kidding around, I didn't need him to think I wanted him.

Fuck! I damn near gagged when I typed that! Don't get me wrong, I'm sure he's great and all but I'll be damned if I ever find another man attractive! It's so goes against everything I stand for!

But yet, I'm his friend. Does that make me a fucking hypocrite or what?

Sara was laughing her ass off when I jumped back from Billy. "What the hell are you laughing at?" I snapped at her.

"Tanner," she came over to where Billy and I were standing still and went to touch me but I jumped back from her too. I hated that she was laughing at me.

"It's not funny," I hissed through clenched teeth.

"Tanner!" She stopped laughing, little lines were forming on her forehead as she frowned. "Come on," she reached for me. "Billy was only playing with you..." her eyebrows rose as she realized what she said. "I mean..."

But I didn't want to hear it, "I have work to do," I mumbled, leaving them where they were standing as I walked away.

I fucking HATE being laughed at. It's right up there with being ignored. Fucking pisses me off!

So for once, I was the reason the mood was spoiled between Sara and me, I was cranky and non responsive for the rest of the night.

"Are you really going to sit there and ignore me?" Sara and I were in her car, since she drive us both to work the night before, we had planned on her taking me home in the morning. "Please don't give me the silence treatment Tanner, I don't like it."

"If it's good enough for you, it's good enough for me."

She sat there for a while, she was looking at me, I could see her out of the corner of my eye. "I need to grab some stuff," she fumbled with the door handle for a moment before crying out in frustration. "Fucking door!" She punched it, the sound of cracking filled the silence. "Fuck! That hurt!"

I turned towards her, I hadn't heard her speak like that before, it really surprised me. But it was the way she held the hand that she hit the door with, that made me feel like an ass. "Let me see," I held out my hand to her but she ignored it. "Come on, let me see your hand."

"No," she whispered. "It's fine."

"Yeah right," I went for her arm but she pulled away. "Sara! Let me see your hand!"

"I feel really stupid."

"Baby you aren't the only one," I gave her a smile which she didn't see. "Your hand Sara." Slowly, she turned towards me, holding her hand out; her eyes glistening in the early morning light. As gently as I could, I took her still curled hand in mine. "Can you straighten your fingers?" I asked.

Her whole hand shook as she did what I asked, straightening them for a moment before they curled back again. "It hurts Tanner," she whimpered.

"I know it does," I asked her to straighten her hand again. Holding her hand straight in mine, I examined it, I wasn't an expert or nothing but I figured that if she could move it, it wasn't broken, so I told her that. "It doesn't seem like you broke anything but," I looked up at her. "I think you should take something for the pain."

"I have Advil in my bag," she nodded to the bag in the backseat. "I could take those, I guess."

"Yeah, but I was thinking of something a little more like this..." despite feeling like a fool, I lowered my head and gently kissed her hand. "Does that help?"

Her voice cracked as she said 'yes', I looked up in time to see her turn her head away from me, wiping her free hand against her eyes. I thought that was a good thing, so I kissed her hand again, smiling at the intake of breath. "Any better now?"

She nodded and then laughed, "I'll probably still have to take the Advil though."

Sara dropped me off at home, I didn't want her to go but she said she really needed to get home. "Well I see you tonight?"

"I hope so," I told her but I knew that it really depended on what Travis was planning for the night. "If I don't see you, how about I call you tomorrow?"

Sara smiled, "That sounds good to me."

"Good," I leaned over, kissing her on the cheek. "Take care of yourself," I whispered. "And don't go beating up any doors while I'm not around."

She drove away after promising me that she would be careful.

Monday, October 8, 2007

It Happened One Night

When Sara came over the other morning after her doctor's appointment, we really didn't get to talk much since it was getting late and we needed to get some sleep before working that night. I was kind of disappointed with how fast she fell asleep, it seemed to be just before her bed hit the pillow - I finished covering her up, she didn't get that done before she passed out. I didn't fall asleep that easily, maybe it was just the excitement of actually having her in my bed once again or maybe I wasn't tired. I stayed awake for a couple hours and for most of that time, I wondered what she's been doing in the pass couple weeks that would make her as tired as she was that day? I started to wonder about these doctor's appointments that she had in the last couple days, could something be wrong? Would she tell me if there was? I didn't want to lose the ground it felt like I gained by having her with me.

I wasn't able to wake her until just before we had to leave for work, so we didn't get a chance to talk then either. I don't understand why it took me almost an hour to wake her up and when I asked her about it, she just smiled and told me that 'dream me' was distracting her.

"Really?" I raised a brow, what I wouldn't give to know what those dreams were about.

She curled up to my side, "mmmhmm," she smiled up at me. "You were very baaaad!"

"Oh now you have to tell me what we were doing!"

"Ummm....no," she giggled, kissing my cheek as she moved to rest on her elbow. "Just 'model' dreams," she grinned.

For a second I didn't know what she was talking about. "Model? Huh?" She nodded and I laughed out loud. "Funny girl!" I moved quickly, grabbing her, turning her over onto her back as I moved over her. "You know you have to tell me about those types of dreams."

"Ha ha!" She linked her hands around my neck. "I don't remember you telling me about yours!"

"Oh?" I grinned, dropping from my hands onto my arms, a move that took me from hovering above her, to being pressed against her body. "Well there was this one dream where you -”

"Tanner!" She gasped as she got a glimpse of my clock. "Is that really the time?"

I glanced at the time - 10:20. "Yes Sara, that's the real time."

"No," she cried as her arms fell from around my neck. "I have to shower!" I lowered my head to her neck, "Tanner!" She giggled.

"You smell alright to me," I nipped at her neck. "No shower for you, you have to tell me about that dream you were having."

She insisted that she had to shower so I reluctantly let her out from under me. She jumped out of my bed, grabbed her bag and headed for the door as I laid in my bed, feeling very...let down.

The light streamed into my room as she opened the door. Groaning, I pulled the covers up over my eyes, blocking out the light. I heard her laugh and say my name, and then I felt a tug on my blankets. "Yes?" I lowered them enough to peek up at her smiling face as she climbed up on my bed, kneeling next to me.

"Don't be sad," she leaned over me, pulling my blankets down further. "I need to shower because of that dream!" Before I could respond, she pressed her lips against mine for a brief second and then she was gone. Running out of my room, her short shirt flapping as she ran, giving me teasing glimpses of her panty clad ass. Just enough to make me think that I was going to have to shower....again. Unfortunately, mom called out to me while Sara was in the shower so I didn't have the time to think about her in my shower with the water cascading over her body.

Sara drove us both to work that night, she said there was no reason for both of us to drive. "I can drop you off in the morning," she told me. I asked her if she was going to stick around in the morning. "Well," she hesitated. "I really should go home, I have some stuff I have to do; I'd like to get them done tomorrow morning so I don't have to worry about it on my days off."

I let it go at that.

Later that night, we were in the staffroom when Billy asked Sara if she was going to go to the bar with him. "You have some more money to win," he told her.

"I don't know," she told him. "I'm not sure if I'm up for that tonight." I tried to pretend that I didn't notice the way she glanced at me out of the corner of her eye when she spoke.

But Billy didn't pretend not to notice. "Oh? Did you have other plans?"

There was a moment or two of silence before she spoke again; I have the feeling she was waiting for me to say something. "I guess not."

Billy glanced back and forth between the two of us before his gaze rested on me. "So what are you doing tonight?"

It was a Friday night, Travis had called me up, asking me to go out with some of his friends. "Going out with the guys," I told him.

Sara turned to me, "With Luke?"

"I don't think so," I shrugged. "I might run into him some time, there aren't that many bars in town." Little did Sara know, since the weekend at the lake, I've been avoiding Luke which was getting harder to do since I've seen him coming and going from Claire's house over the last couple weeks. One morning, I swear he was on his way over to see me but mom was outside and she told him I was sleeping, so he left. It was only a matter of time before he cornered me, I knew this but I wasn't sure how I would react to him.

Break was over, Sara was gathering her empty pop can and bar wrapper. "Well I hope you have fun." But she didn't seem to really mean it.

Billy and I got up, following Sara out of the staffroom, with Crazy following us; even though we were ignoring her the best we could. "If you happen to be around the club tonight, stop in."

"Sure," I said. "I'll be there."

Crazy jumped in front of us. "What time should I be there Tanner?"

I heard Sara groan. "What time?" I asked Crazy and she nodded, smiling. "Oh I don't know," I pretended to think about it, catching Sara's dirty look as she swiped her name badge. She started around the corner when I answered Crazy. "Any time I'm not there is great for me! Now," I moved around her, swiped my card before turning the corner, leaving Billy standing alone with Crazy.

I would've felt bad about sticking him with her but I couldn't help but laugh as I heard him try to tell her nicely to leave him alone.

"That's mean." Sara was leaning against the wall by the women's bathroom, her arms crossed over her chest. "Leaving Billy alone with that!" My eyes traveled down to where her arms rested, I sighed. "Tanner!" She pushed off the wall, swatting my arm as she moved past me. "You are such a pervert!"

"Yeah," I agreed, turning around to watch her walk away. "But you like it." Sara just laughed. "I know you like it," I called after her as she turned to go into the infant department.

"You are a dead man," Billy growled at me when he flew around the corner with Crazy still talking to him.

"Billy! My man," I threw my arm around his shoulders, placing my other hand on my chest. "You can't kill me man, your best friend wouldn't like that much," I said jokingly thinking Sara was long gone into her department.

"Don't you go getting cocky now," she hollered as she poked her head out from the aisle, a big smile on her face. "You don't have me yet."

"It's just a matter of time!" I called back to her as she disappeared. "A matter of time," I chuckled as I turned back to Billy...

...who was giving me a funny look.

"Get off me Tanner."

Thursday, October 4, 2007

All The Small Things

She missed me, I was ecstatic. How could I not be? I've been waiting for two long horrible weeks to hear that she was at least thinking about me in some small way.

She missed me. I wanted to scream it out and do a little dance.

But instead, I smiled. Grinned. Whatever you wanted to call it, it never had been so big and it never had been so hard to stop it either.

She missed me!

"I miss you too," I told her and yes, I meant it! I missed her touch, her scent. I missed falling asleep with her and waking up to find her clinging to me as she slept. I missed all the goofy conversations we had and believe it or not, I missed all the 'pulling my hair out, I want to scream' conversations too. But most of all I missed her smile, something I haven't had flashed in my direction for a while.

"Did you want me to come over there?" I asked her, ready to drop everything before she changed her mind.

"I do," she gave a small laugh and then sighed. "But Tanner we both have so much work to do, I don't think you should."

I wanted to argue that point but she was right, it was a two truck night and we both had a lot of work to do; she had 8 skids in Infants and I had 12 in Pets, we would be lucky if we got through it all, without hurting ourselves, before the night was over.

"I'll see you in a couple hours for Lunch," she said before she hung up the phone.

The second I hung up, I made a beeline over to Toys, skipping across one of my empty skids as I went, permagrin, still on my face.

"Hey," I said to Billy as he returned to the skid he was working on.

"Hello," he glanced at me and did a double take. "Wow, what's got you so happy?" He asked then laughed, "Wait, don't tell me," he leaned against his skid. "It has something to do with Sara."

I nodded, "Yeah she just called me and told me something good."

"Oh?" He raised a brow. "Must be nice, she only calls me to tell me to go help her riser - what did she say that's making you do a creepy impersonation of the Cheshire cat?"

Placing my elbow on the closest box, I leaned in. "Well," I was speaking in almost a whisper as if everyone would overhear if I spoke normally. "See she was crying and -"

Billy backed off, "You made Sara cry? You know I'm going to have to hurt you, right?"

"No, I didn't make her cry, she was crying becasue..." I trailed off.

"Why was she crying?"

"I guess because of me..."

Billy motioned for me to come closer, and me, being the brillant guy I am, I did it. He slapped me up side of my head. "Hey!"

"Don't think I won't do it again," he told me. "Making girls cry," he shook his head, "don't you know that's only cute when you are a little kid?"

"I didn't make her cry!" I snapped at him. "At least not that way! I thought she was crying becuase of what crazy was doing in the staffroom but she said she wasn't crying becuase of that -"

"Then why?" He cut in.

"Well if you shut up long enough, I would tell you that she said she missed me!"

Billy rolled his eyes, "It's about damn time! I told her over a week ago that it was crazy that she wasn't talking to you. I just hope this means you'll both stop being so damn cranky!" I went to say some thing but Billy started to walk away from me, muttering about the insnaity levels in straights being higher.

Sara and I tried to have a decent conversation at lunch but Crazy was back doing the same stuff she did at first break.

I wanted Sara to come over after work or go out for breakfast but she had stuff she had to do at home; she has had a few different appointments in the last couple days: one was for her mom - she went so her mom didn't have to drive herself, apparently her mom doesn't like to drive that much - the one yesterday was a dentist appointment in her town and this morning after work she said she had a doctor's appointment in town.

"I could come over after," she told me. "If you aren't asleep by the time I get finished."

I told her it didn't matter what time she got out, I would be waiting for her.

She just called me from the doctor's office to tell me that she was on her way.

Do you know what the best part of Sara's visit today? She's staying with me until we have to go to work tonight!

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

Strange Doesn't Even Describe It

I have a feeling that this week is going to go down at one of the strangest weeks of my life.

I should've known that Crazy wasn't going to let it go with joining Sara, Billy and me, uninvited, at our table in the staffroom and be ignored the entire time. No, that would've been too easy. I guess in Crazy Land ignoring people means, 'I like you'.

Or maybe it means, 'Please follow me into the men's bathroom', because that's what she did last night!

That's right, the fucking lunatic decided that it was cool to follow me into the bathroom just after first break was called. But that wasn't the worse thing! I didn't even know she was there until I was in the middle of doing my business at the urinal! I happened to glance over my shoulder for some reason, maybe I felt like I was being watch, and I saw her standing there, staring at me with a smile on her face.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" I shouted, turning back on to her, almost spraying the floor as I did so. "GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!!"

She laughed, she didn't say anything but she started to move towards me.

"This is the MEN'S room," I snapped at her while trying to finish off and zip up before she came too close. "You shouldn't be in here! You're not a man!"

"Do you want to check?" She was standing next to me now, her eyes focused on my crotch but thankfully I managed to close up shop before she got there. "Oh damn," she pouted. "Why did you put it away?"

"Because it's not for you!" I snapped. "Get the hell out of here and leave me alone! How many times do I have to tell you that? Are you really this stupid?"

"I'm not stupid," Crazy leaned against the sink I walked over too, she watched as I washed the black ink and dirt from the boxes off my hands. "I know want me."

"Yeah, right!" I shook my head, laughing at the sheer stupidity of that comment. "I want you as badly as I want to get in a car accident. Leave me alone Crazy."

"Ohhh," she put one of her hands on my arm, moved in closer to me. "You gave me a pet name," she smiled. "I bet the skank whore Sara doesn't have a pet name."

"You need some serious help," I yanked my arm away from her. "It's not a pet name, it's a description of what you are but I'm starting to think that 'batshit crazy' would be even better." I turned towards the door and grabbed the handle. "Don't ever say shit like that about Sara again and leave me alone."

I was pissed, I don't know why she thought I was interested in her in any way. Why would a girl think that a guy who doesn't talk to her, is interested in her? It doesn't make any sense at all. Guys don't do that! If I'm interested in someone, they'll damn well know I'm interested! No fucking around with the mind game bullshit!

As if it wasn't bad enough that Crazy followed me and pissed me off when I was planning on talking to Sara about us, Sara and Billy just had to be walking back towards the staffroom when I swung the door open so hard that it slammed against the wall.

It was like time slowed down - the door slammed against the wall, Sara and Billy turned to look behind them, I froze as my mind was screaming 'you've got to be fucking kidding me!', and Crazy swooped out of the bathroom behind me, saying something that made all the color drain from Sara's face.

I have no idea what she said, all I could hear was this buzzing in my head and the 'oh fuck! oh fuck! OH FUUUUCCCKKK!' in my head.

"It's not what you think!" I blurted out, reaching forward as if touching Sara would make her believe me.

"Of course it was Tanner!" Crazy laughed, "Why lie about what just happened?"

"What happened?" I spun around. "Nothing happened!"

"Tan-ner," she whined, stomping her foot as well. "Why do you deny it? Why can't you admit that you enjoyed what happened in there?"

"I can't believe this," I groaned. "I took a piss!" I snapped at her. "That's the only fucking thing that happened in there! And you know it!" Turning around, my eyes slid to meet Sara's. "You know I wouldn't do that."

She wasn't happy at all, her whole stanch screamed 'fucking pissed'. She stood with her arms crossed over her chest, she wasn't smiling. "Do I?" She raised a brow and said one more word. "Claire."

FUCK! I had totally forgotten about Claire. "Ok, so I did...once! But that was completely different. I was different."

"It was twice," she said softly as she glanced at Billy. "Let's go." She turned away from me.

"Sara wait -" I grabbed her arm, stopping her but she didn't turn around. I sighed. "I swear nothing happened Sara. You know I wouldn't do that when I-"

She looked over her shoulder at me. "You don't owe me any explanations Tanner, you are single, you can do whatever you want with who ever you want and it's none of my business. Besides, I -"

"I didn't do anything with her!" I cut in but she continued to talk.

"...know it takes longer than that to get a guy off."

"What?" I stared down at her. "What?" I repeated, I wasn't sure if she was saying what I think she was saying.

Sara looked pass me to Crazy who was busy staring at her nails as if she was bored with the conversation. "You must really think I'm stupid if you thought I would believe that anything happened between Tanner and you."

Crazy faked a yawn, "You are stupid."

Sara laughed, "Well at least I'm not crazy," she said as she started to walk away with Billy. "Are you coming?" She glanced over her shoulder at me.

She didn't need to ask twice, I took off after them as fast as I could, hoping that Crazy would leave me alone now.

But she didn't, she followed us to the staffroom and sat down in Sara's chair, which was next to me, forcing Sara to sit elsewhere. I think she was trying to piss Sara off since the whole thing at the bathroom didn't work out the way she wanted too but Sara didn't say a word, she just grabbed her stuff and sat down across from me, next to Billy.

I have to admit, I didn't know Sara had it in her to remain so calm when Crazy was doing her best to provoke her - saying mean things under her breath about Sara, being rude and cutting her off every time she spoke and when Sara did happen to say something, Crazy would laugh and tell her that what she said was stupid.

I wanted to flip on her but Sara kept giving me this look and shaking her head. I was biting my tongue and after the longest 15 minutes in history, I was afraid that I had bitten a piece of it off.

We all went back to the floor, I tried to talk to Sara about what happen but she just smiled and told me everything was fine. I didn't believe her but what else could I do but go back to my department.

Ten minutes later, the phone in my department rang, the extension that showed up on the screen was Infants. I picked up the receiver, "Hello?"

"I don't hate too many people Tanner but that crazy bitch is one of them!"

I leaned against the shelf next to the phone. "Why didn't you say anything to her Sara?"

She sighed, "You wouldn't understand Tanner."

"Why don't you try me? I might surprise you."

"It's going to sound stupid," she warned me.

"I don't care," I told her. "I want to know why you didn't stand up for yourself, or let me say something."

"Tanner it's better not to say anything."

Ok, I didn't understand. "What do you mean?"

"Well," she took a deep breath, I couldn't help but wonder if she shrugged as well. "People like Crazy need to put others down to feel better about themselves," she explained. "If you argue with them, they will just go on and on, getting more and more upset but if you just let them say what they want..."

"Sara you know she'll only continue saying stuff if you let her get away with it; ignoring it won't stop it."

Silence.

"Sara? Are you still there?"

Sniff. "Yes."

"Are you crying?"

Sniff, sniff....

"Sara please don't cry, Crazy doesn't deserve the tears."

"I'm not...sniff...cry...sniff...ing cause of...sniff...her..."

"Then why are you crying Sara?"

There was silence, except for a few shaky breaths and some more sniffing on her end.

"Sara, honey, come on, tell me why you are crying."

Her reply was spoken so softly, I barely heard it. "I miss you Tanner."