Setting Up

"And that's how you do it!" Mom clapped her hands together and smiled proudly up at me as I stared down at the counter in front of me. It hadn't been as difficult as I thought to complete the item we had been working on for about an hour. No the difficult part was standing there in the kitchen with my mom, doing everything she told me to do and have to listen to Travis' comments as he sat at the table with Shelly and watched me.

"Fuck you!" I snapped at him once but my mom didn't like that too much, she slapped me across the back of the head with her dishtowel.

"I can still wash your mouth out with soap!" She told me.

"Did you hear what he said?" I asked her as I rubbed the back of my head. Travis had made the comment of how mom always wanted a daughter and how pretty-ish I would look in pink frills.

"I heard what he said," mom had told me but she didn't say anything to him about it! I couldn't believe it, it ticked me off that he could get away with something like that. Fucker!

Once I finished cleaning up, I headed over to the table as mom sat down with the scissors and tape that I requested moments before.

"You got her a present too?" Shelly seemed a little surprised when I started to pull from the bag on the table - the first thing was birthday wrapping paper. "And you are actually going to wrap it?" She turned to Travis, "Why can't you be more like Tanner?" She asked before telling me that Travis' idea of wrapping gifts was to wrap the bag that he carried the present home from the store it, around it and then hand it to her. "He would never do what you are doing for Sara."

"Now Shelly that's not right," mom jumped in. "You knew how romantically inept Travis was when you married him, there's no point in complaining or comparing him to Tanner."

"Yeah!" Travis grinned and slapped his hand down against the table. "Thank you mom."

Mom nodded, "But it wouldn't hurt you to show a little love either Travis, Shelly is your wife, don't you think she deserves to be loved?"

Shelly turned to him. "Yeah!" She exclaimed with a smile on her face. "I deserve some lovin'!"

Travis raised a brow, he glanced at me, then mom and finally he looked at Shelly again. "I'll show you lovin' woman!" He grabbed her around the waist as he leaned in and buried his face against her neck.

I did my best to ignore them, it was difficult to watch them together when everything Travis got to do - every touch, every kiss - made me ache for the moment Sara finally lets me touch her. I was hoping it was soon - my wrist has been very sore lately!

Soon I had Sara's present wrapped - it looked like my nephews wrapped it but hey! at least it was real wrapping paper not the bag I carried it home in - and I headed upstairs to lie down for a while before showering and getting ready for work.

Ten twenty I had returned to the kitchen, Travis and Shelly had long since taken the boys home, mom just happened to be in there getting something to drink. "Are you sure you don't mind helping me out with this?" I asked her for probably the millionth time since the day before when I told her about my plans.

"Of course not," she replied. "I told you I wanted to help, I think it's really sweet the trouble you are going through to make this birthday a special one for Sara, she'll love it."

"I sure hope so," I gave mom a hug. "Thank you so much."

On my way to work Sunday night, I stopped into Tim Horton's to pick up hot chocolate and doughnuts for Sara, Billy and I. It wasn't for her birthday, it was a 'tradition' of sorts for the two of them, whenever it started to get cold, they would take turns buying hot chocolate and doughnuts to have at work. I've been lucky enough to be included in their 'traditions', it was my turn to buy. Plus it was -21 outside, I needed something to warm me up until I saw Sara.

Normally when I get to work, I head straight to the staffroom but Sunday night I waited at the front for them to come in. Sara was the first to come in, she was in her 'going places' stride mode, she almost walked right pass me without stopping.

"Hey," she gave me a confused look as she walked over to where I sat down to drink some hot chocolate and eat my doughnut while I waited. "What are you doing up here?"

"Waiting for you and Billy," I told her. "Hot chocolate?"

She nodded eagerly as she removed her gloves from her hands. "Yes! I'm freezing! It's way too cold out there night!" She reached for the paper cup but I pulled it back. "Hey!"

"Hey what?" I stood before her, took her hands in mine and tried to tug her to me. "You said you were freezing, I can warm you up quicker than a cup of hot chocolate." She let me pull her into my arms which surprised me, she had been avoiding any touching at work. "Feeling any warmer?"

"Hmm," she pulled back a little, her hand slipped up over the front of my jacket until her fingers closed around the zipper pull. "I will in a minute," she told me as she unzipped the zipper. She let out a contented sigh as she settled her cheek against my tshirt covered chest. "It's really warm here."

Any thought I had disappeared the moment she started to unzip my jacket. With her face planted against my chest, her ear able to hear the thumping of my heart, I wished I could take her home. "We don't need to work tonight, do we?" I asked hopefully.

Sara softly laughed as she gazed up at me. "I wish we didn't have too."

"Oh really?" I raised a brow. "What would you rather be doing tonight?"

She gave me a naughty grin, "Well I -"

"Oh thank God!" Billy came over to us, his gaze focused on the beverage tray on the counter beside us and the lone cup sitting there. "I worried that you forgot but you didn't!" He grabbed the cup and held it in his gloved hands, "It's so damn cold -" his voice trailed off as he turned to see Sara locked in my arms. "Oh!" He turned away again, "I could take this to the back," he said. "Yeah, I'll just go..."

"We were just going back too," Sara pulled away from me causing my to groan my displeasure. "We have to clock in and start Tanner."

"I don't wanna," I reached for her again but she moved too quickly for me.

"Too bad," she told me with a grin. "You have too."

"Your timing really sucks Billy!" I yelled after him as he walked away.

"Sorry!" He yelled back but he didn't sound all that sorry. I went to tell Sara that I didn't think he actually was but she slipped her hand in mine and I forgot what I was going to say.

As we walked towards the back hand in hand, I kept glancing at her - I couldn't believe it was really happening, we were actually making progress. Ok, so it may not sound like a big deal but it was, like I said, she never touched me at work since that night, I don't think she wanted anyone to know that there was something between us. Not that everyone didn't already know, there was talk, I heard it. People knew and they weren't sure about us because they weren't sure I was good enough for her. Bastards! Like I care what they think!

The first part of the night passed by rather quickly. In fact I was a little surprised when Judy - our manager - paged me to go to the front office, which was my signal to head to the back.

Normally when I headed to the back, I walked right by Infants where Sara was working but on Sunday, I took a detour, I headed back through Furniture and from there I made my way to the training room where Judy was standing, waiting for me.

"So do I get to see?" She asked as the door to the training room started to open.

Peeking through the small opening, my mom grinned when she saw me. "It's all set up Tanner," she said as she swing the door opened to reveal the room she had spent the last half hour getting ready for me. "Sara is going to love it!"

"Oh my!" Judy gasped before turning to tell me that her birthday was in March. "I won't complain if you want to do something like this for me."

"Aha," I chuckled uncomfortably before telling her I couldn't say because that would ruin the surprise for her. Turning to my mom, I gave her a hug. "Thank you so much for doing this. It's looks great!"

"I only did what you asked Tanner," mom gave the room a quick glance before saying she'll leave me to do the rest. "I'll clean everything up once you are gone back to work."

"Mom you don't have to do that, I can clean it up. You should go home and get some rest."

"Nonsense," mom waved my concern off. "I'm happy to help." She smiled, "Besides, I want to know what Sara's reaction is, I can't stand to wait until you get home to find out!" Mom told me Judy had asked her to keep her company during lunch so she wouldn't be bored. "Have a good time," she told me. "Just keep it PG, you are at work you know."

I promised mom I would be good - well as good as I could be and still be alone with Sara. Judy called lunch as mom and her headed off in the direction I came.

The time between the moment Judy called break and the moment Sara turned the corner with Billy to clock out for lunch had to be the longest time period the whole night.

"Hey," Sara shot me a questioning look when she saw me. "What are you doing back here? I thought you were called to the office?"

"I was," I told her.

"Oh? Was everything ok?"

I hesitated, it was all part of the plan to get Sara to go down the hall towards the training room without thinking something birthday related was up. "Can I..." I glanced down the hall and then back at her. "Can I talk to you down there?"

"Sure," she looked worried. Part of me felt like an ass for worrying her but the other part of me was enjoying it because soon she would see that there is nothing to worry about. "I just..." she turned to Billy, who was standing off to the side waiting for us to move towards the staffroom. "We'll be right in Billy," she told him. He studied us for a moment before turning towards the lunchroom.

I took Sara's hand and lead her towards the training room. "So what's going on Tanner?" She asked as we walked.

"I just needed..." my words paused as I stopped in front of the training room, the door was wide open. I could see the flickering light from the candles mom had lit, I waited for her to notice.

"You needed what?" She glanced towards the training room briefly before turning her attention back to me. "What did Judy want?" She asked and then added as she pointed towards the room. "Am I seeing things or are there candles burning in there?" She didn't wait for me to answer, she took a step towards the door and froze.

Up To Some Good

"If anyone asks, this call never took place."

"What?"

"You heard me Tanner, if anyone asks this call never happened, I value my life too much."

"Billy what the hell have you been drinking?"

"Nothing, I'm completely sober."

"You sound drunk. Why would anyone ask? And why did this conversation never take place?"

"Sara will ask, and she will kill me if you tell her I told you, she told me not too."

"Oh? What doesn't she want me to know?"

"That tomorrow night is her birthday, she doesn't want anyone to make a big deal out of it."

"WHAT? She doesn't want me to know it's her birthday?"

"Fuck Tanner, that's what I just said!"

"Why not? What's wrong with making a big deal out of her birthday?"

"Nothing."

"But...?"

"She has had nothing but crappy birthdays for the past couple years, Ken -"

"The Bastard! I told you I don't want to hear his name."

"Yes, the Bastard. He never did anything for her, he never even remembered."

"Fucker."

"Yeah, so she doesn't like to make a big deal out of her birthday now because of him."

"Screw that, she's with me now and I happen to like birthdays."

"That's what I thought, got to go Tanner, see you at work tomorrow."

It was Saturday afternoon when Billy called me and we had that conversation. I hung up wondering what the hell I was going to do for Sara, there was no way I was going to let her birthday pass without doing something. Sure we aren't officially together - this damn taking it slow was really killing me - but she deserved something.

I called her up.

"Did Billy just call you?" She asked the moment she picked up the phone.

"Umm, no," I laughed. "Why? Was he supposed too?"

"No, I told him...nevermind."

"Yes, I tell him that all the time too."

She laughed, "So what are you calling for Tanner?"

"Just calling to talk to you. I was wondering what you were doing tomorrow afternoon?"

"HA!" She exclaimed. "Billy did call you!"

"Sara really? Since when does Billy have to call for me to want to know if you are free to do something with me?"

"Well, I...umm..." she sighed. "Sorry, I just thought that he...well..."

"Sara you know I want to see you, and not just at work." In fact I've been trying to get her to come over or go somewhere with me after work and on our days off since the night at karaoke. Not that we haven't gone out together, we have, she just has been avoiding being completely alone with me. I like to think it's because she can't keep her hands off me!

"I know you do Tanner and I want to see you too but..."

"But what?"

"Well tomorrow isn't a good day, my mom has stuff she wants me to do with her."

"Anything I can tag along on?" I knew she would say no but I figured I'd ask anyway.

"She kind of wants to spend some time with just me Tanner." I couldn't really tell if she was disappointed or relieved, either way it didn't matter.

"Oh ok, I guess I'll have to wait until tomorrow night to see you."

"I'm sorry," she said softly.

"It's ok," I told her. "I think you are worth the wait."

"Oh Tanner." I believe if I were along side her at that moment, she would've either blushed and turned away or hugged me tight.

Once I hung up from talking to Sara, I called Billy back.

"Is her birthday tomorrow? You said 'tomorrow night' when you called earlier."

"It's the 26th, so technically tomorrow night since we'll be working into the morning of the 26th."

"Ok good." I thought I would only have an hour with her on her birthday but it being on Monday really helped, it gave me more time to show her how her birthday should go. "Are you doing anything for her? Getting her something?"

"I always get her something," he told me. "She pretends to get all upset but secretly I know she loves the fact that I remember." He paused and then asked me what I was planning on getting her. "You know you don't have to get her anything, that's why she didn't want me to tell you, she didn't want you to think you had to do or get her anything."

"I have an idea," I told him. He tried to get more info out of me than that but I wouldn't give it up. "You'll have to wait and hear all about it later."

"Well if you need any help or suggestions..."

"I know how to get hold of you."

But I knew that I wouldn't need his help with what I had planned, I would just need the help of one person - my mom - and the cooperation of my manager to pull off the plan.

By Saturday night, I had everything I needed. I couldn't wait to go to work the next night.

One Promise Leads To Turtle Pace!

"Hey Billy," Sara's voice dropped to a whisper as her hand slipped up over Billy's chest.

"Yes?" Billy raised a brow in her direction.

"You know," she bat her eyes as her fingers played on his chest. "If you ever want to...you know...I'd gladly help you out." She captured her bottom lip between her teeth while she waited for Billy to work out what she was saying.

I knew right away what she was saying, I wasn't impressed at all. Mine, I tell you! I want her to look at me like that, say that to me! I'll guarantee you, I wouldn't need to think about it! Little Miss Sara would quickly know just what those 'model' dreams I have around her were really all about!

Claire purred as she cuddled up to Billy. "Oh me too! I'd help you out too!"

"What the fuck!" Luke looked to me for answers but I was too deep in the red I was seeing.

Billy finally clued in, he turned bright red. "Girls..." he chuckled nervously as he too looked towards me, as if I was going to help the fucker handle two women! Lucky fucker! I know, he's gay but still! Lucky fucker I'd do just about anything to have Sara looking at me like that, not too interested in Claire but hey, if they were offering!

HA! I'm kidding!

"Back off," Sara laughed as she tried to glare at Claire. "I'm Billy's best girl friend, I call dibs!"

"No way," Claire giggled. "Besides, don't you have other options?" She glanced over her shoulder at me. "Leave Billy to me, I'll show him a night he'd never forget."

"Ahh," Billy looked like a deer staring down the barrel of a shotgun. He tried to untangle himself from both Sara and Claire but they didn't let him go that easily. If I wasn't so bloody jealous, I would've been laughing along with Travis, who stood off to the side with his arms around Shelly.

"Ok girls," Cal moved up behind Billy, grabbing both of the girls' wrists as he spoke. "I'm sure if Billy were inclined, he'd seek you out."

"Oh...poo!" Sara pouted, kicked the ground and sighed dramatically. Claire did something similar to Sara as she wandered back over to where Luke stood. Billy on the other hand looked really relived as Cal's arms slipped around his waist and....

I couldn't tell you what else, I looked away.

Yeah, so maybe I'm not totally comfortable seeing Billy and Cal touching or kissing but that doesn't make me a homophobe. I'm not! I really don't care, it just takes a while to get use to it.

Besides, I had other things to focus my attention on, mainly Sara. She was crossing over to me when Luke grabbed her hand and pulled her closer to him and Claire. "I'll gladly take his place if you two really want to team up on someone!"

"Ewww!" Sara jumped away from Luke. "I don't think so!"

Travis was laughing his ass off now. "I was just thinking the same thing man!" His admission earned him a punch in the chest from Shelly. "God woman!" He rubbed his chest. "I was joking!"

Shelly glared at him, "Sure you were!" Spinning on her heel, she stomped away.

"Fuck!" Travis cursed as he watched her walk away. "For fucksakes woman! Stop being so fucking touchy! I was kidding! I don't want to be with anyone but you!"

Shelly gave him the finger without stopping.

"Fuck, fuck, FUCK!" Travis took off after Shelly, yelling for her to wait for him.

Silence had settled over the group as we tried not to watch my brother fuck up his relationship once again.

Billy and Cal excused themselves, they headed off some where, I didn't pay much attention.

"Yeah..." Luke looked at me. "It was good to see you man, give me a call some time, we'll go for a drink or something."

"Yeah sure," I said absently, I was trying to see what was going on with Travis and Shelly - he caught up to her. I wished I knew what they were saying but we were too far away.

"Hey," I felt a tug on my jacket. I glanced down to see Sara staring up at me, her eyes wide with sadness. "I'm sorry," she whispered as her bottom lip trembled. "I didn't mean for my joking around with Billy to lead to..." she lowered her head. "I'm so sorry Tanner."

"It's not your fault," I reached for her, my hands found her waist. "They have been having problems," I told her as she wrapped her arms around me. God she felt so good pressed against me like that, I almost forgot everything else that was going on.

"That makes me sad," she said softly. "I really like your brother and his wife, I wish there was something we could do to help them."

"Sara," I sighed. "I wish there was something too but this is something they have to work out for themselves."

Sara nodded as she buried her face against my chest. "Oh Tanner..." she sighed contently.

"Oh Tanner what?" The second I asked, I wanted to take it back, I didn't want her to think I was pressing her for anything.

She didn't move for a few moments.

"Sara?" I moved back as I could see her face, her eyes were closed. "Baby I didn't mean to -" She slapped her hands on my cheeks and pulled me down until her lips were pressed against mine - I forgot what I was supposed to do for a moment, it was like my mind went into shock.

"Tanner," she giggled against my mouth.

"Mmmm?" I could've stayed like that forever, just having her lips against mine was stirring things up down below.

"I need to take my time," she told me. "I don't want too," she laughed. "But I need too."

All I heard was 'I want you'. "Mmmm," I groaned.

"Do you have anything to say?" She pulled back a little and stared into my eyes.

"I want you too."

"Tanner!" Sara laughed out loud.

I shook my head, "I mean...yeah! Sure, whatever you need to do baby, I'm all for it."

"Are you sure?" She played with the zipper on my jacket.

"Mmmhmm."

"Oh ok," she smiled as my zipper lowered until my jacket hung open. "Right now though," she slipped her hands around me, pressing her body against mine. "I just want to feel you."

I have no idea how long we stood like that - me leaning back against my car, my arms around her as she stood between my legs, pressed up against me with her hands up under the back of my shirt - but that night was one of the best nights I've had since I've come home. Sure there were other nights where Sara and I actually did a little more stuff but having her say that she wanted a relationship with me - that was...fucking awesome!

Now, if only I could convince her that she wants to put me out of my misery and get naked with me!

Beginnings Of Change

Life since the night at karaoke has taken a turn for the better. And by better I mean that Sara has finally loosened up enough to really be a lot of fun to be around. She laughs, she jokes - it's like the cover has been taken off of her true self and she's...well fuck! She's driving me completely insane! I swear that woman can't even look at me anymore without getting a rise out of me. I salute her more often than not these days!

Fuck me, she's a flirt. A tease. She says all these seemingly innocent things but her eyes tell what she's really thinking. She's a pervert and I want to tap that ass so badly. But I can't. I made the stupid mistake of promising her that we'll take things slow.

What the fuck was I thinking?!?!?! Take it slow? I've been waiting for her to get to this point for months!

It's my own fault, I didn't even argue that night when we stood outside the bar with Billy, Cal, Travis and Shelly. I don't really remember why we were all standing around outside, all I remember is Sara's energy level - she was literally bouncing. I blame that for distracting me and making me make that stupid promise.

"I'm so happy!" She giggled as she stood by my side as I leaned back against my car.

"Really?" I wrapped my arm around her shoulders, "I didn't notice." Sara laughed, turning to me, her hand coming to rest on my chest.

"You have no idea how wond - "

"Hey Tanner!" Sara stiffened in my arms as Luke appeared in front of us.

With Claire in tow. "Hey," Claire said shyly, she didn't look at any of us, she seemed a little uncomfortable.

Sara started to pull away from me, "Where are you going?"

"No where," she gave me a weak smile.

At that moment Luke decided to be an ass. "Still hanging out with the faggots Tanner?"

"LUKE!" Both Sara and Claire moved at the same time, both striking Luke as they shot him dirty looks.

"Hey!" Luke frowned, rubbing his arm where the girls hit him but they had withdrawn to Billy's side where they wrapped their hands around Billy's arm. "What are you doing Claire?"

Billy wrapped his arms around both of the girls' waist. "Don't you know?" He chuckled. "These women love me, being gay always gets me the hottest chicks."

"Yeah?" Luke laughed, "Too bad they want real men!"

"Billy is a real man," Sara smiled up at him - giving him a look that made me want to wring his bloody neck. How dare she look at him like that! I've been waiting for that look for ever! That was my look! And the kiss his planted on his jaw was mine too!

"How...? What...?" Luke sputtered as Claire followed Sara's lead and stared adoringly up at Billy as well. His jaw dropped when she kissed Billy as well - I knew exactly how he felt.

And fuck, it's late...

Let The White Dove Sing

I had started after Sara before the Bastard had finished his song but the crowd was almost impossible to get through, we ended up meeting at the door.

"Hey!" He grabbed me by the shoulder, stopping me in my tracks. "Get lost asshole, Sara is my girl, she has no interest in you."

"Get off!" I yanked my shoulder back from his grip. "Sara isn't stupid enough to fall for that sad stunt you just pulled."

He laughed, "That's where you are wrong asshole, Sara loves it when I sing to her." He shoved me out of the way and headed out the door.

I was not that far behind him, I wasn't going to let him get to her. She had to be strong for her own sake.

As the cool air hit my body, making me shiver, I quickly scanned the area looking for Sara, she was not that far from the front door, in the middle of the parking lot pacing and by the looks of it, talking to herself.

She must have been lost in her thoughts, she didn't even notice us come up behind her. The Bastard got to her before I did, "Hey babygirl."

Sara froze, I could literally see all the muscles in her back go stiff. Slowly she turned around to face the man who damn near killed her a few months ago. "Ken."

"Oh come on baby," Ken moved closer to her. "Surely you can do better than that." His hand reached out to touch her and that's when I had enough, I leapt forward, grabbing his wrist.

I applied as much pressure as I could to his wrist. "Don't you dare touch her."

"Tanner, please don't." I glanced at Sara, meeting her eyes which were pleading with me.

"Yeah Tanner, don't." The bastard sneered. "I will hurt you."

"Oh?" I rolled my eyes. "I thought it was only women you liked to use as a punching bag."

Sara gasped, "Tanner!"

But the Bastard just smirked, "I'd be more than willing to kick your ass you faggot."

"KEN!" Sara slapped him across the arm, he didn't even flinch.

"Try it," I knew I was calling him out and he could probably kick my ass no problem but there was no way I was going to let him any closer to Sara than he was right now.

"Oh for the love of God!" Sara threw her hands up in the air, before coming up to both of us. "Stop this right now," she demanded as she grabbed my wrist and pulled my arm back, trying to get me to let go of the Bastard's wrist.

"I'm not doing anything," the Bastard said as he looked down at her as he opened his hand as if to say he was innocent. "Babygirl I need to talk to you -

"Fuck that!" I cut in.

He pulled his wrist out of my grasp but other wise he ignored me. "Sara, baby, I'm sorry for everything. We really need to talk."

"Yeah right," I scoffed. "Sara doesn't want -"

"You are right, we do need to talk Ken."

"What?" I stared down at her but she was looking at him. "You can't be serious Sara! What if he -"

"Tanner," she turned her face upwards, a smile on her face. "I think you should go back inside. Ken is right, we do need to talk, there's so much that needs to be said but I don't want you here for it. I need you to go back inside and let me have a moment alone with him."

"WHAT?" I was dumbfounded. How the hell could she want to be around him after all he did to her? Was Billy right? Would Sara go back to the Bastard? Just because he got up and sang a stupid song?

"Please Tanner? I need this."

"Why?" I asked her.

"I can't explain it Tanner, I just know that I need this. Please go back inside."

"Yeah," the Bastard but it. "Get lost jackass."

"Ken!" Sara shot him a dirty look before turning back to me. "Tanner would you please do this for me?"

"This is fucked up! He beat the crap out of you and you want to be alone with him?" She nodded. "Are you fucking crazy?"

"Don't talk to me like that Tanner!" She crossed her arms over her chest, a stubborn look on her pretty face as she glared at me. "I don't like it and I don't deserve it!"

"You heard her," the bastard came up behind Sara, grinning over her shoulder as he slipped his hands onto her hips. "Run along."

My hands were clenched in fists of rage, I wanted to punch the Bastard out for touching her and I wanted to shake Sara for being stupid enough to give him the time of day, he didn't deserve any of her attention. "Fine," I snapped. "But don't come crying to me when he hurts you again."

"Tanner!" Sara tried to stop me but I turned and stomped away.

I was fuming when I entered the bar. I wanted to hit something. Who in their right mind voluntarily agrees to be alone with a man like the Bastard?

"Where's Sara?" Billy asked when I plopped down moodily onto my bar stool.

"Fuck Sara," I snapped.

"No thanks," Billy laughed. I shot him a dirty look. "Oh-kay!" He glanced at Cal for a brief second. "Seriously," he looked at me. "Where is Sara?"

"Out being a fucking moron," I told him. "She wanted to talk to the Bastard. What the hell could she be thinking? Talk to him? She should be running as far from him as she can!"

"You left her out there with Ken?" Billy jumped up. "Are you completely dense?"

"Fuck you!" I pushed away from the table. "Fuck you and fuck her! I'm tired of her bullshit! If she wants to be with him, then I'm done."

"She doesn't," Billy protested but I didn't care to hear it, I needed something to drink. Many some things to drink. I headed off in search of a stiff drink.

"Hey bro!" Travis found me a couple minutes later, drowning my second shot of mind numbing whiskey. "What are you doing?" He eyed the two empty and the two full shot glasses. "Since when do you do shots?"

"Fuck off," I picked up the third shot. "To stupid women," I toasted before pouring the vile liquid down my throat - I wanted to gag, I hated whiskey with a passion.

"Ah women problems," Travis pulled up a stool and sat down, stealing my last shot. "I can understand that one."

"Fucking women," I muttered. "Where is the waitress?" I looked around for her, she wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"She'll be around," Travis dropped the now empty shot glass down on the table. "What's going on with you? What did Sara do to make you start doing shots?"

"I don't want to talk about it," I told him.

"Oh ok," he shrugged.

"How stupid can she be?" I asked him and before too long I told him what was going on. "I just don't understand it," I told him. "He treated her like crap and she's out there talking to him? What about me? I've been here for her."

"You think that entitles you to something?"

"Fuck yeah!"

"Fuck no," Travis laughed. "Tanman one thing I've learnt in my marriage is that you never expect anything because you damn well aren't going to get it."

"What ever," I scoffed. "Shelly would jump through rings of fire, naked, to get you to pay attention to her like I have with Sara."

"I pay attention to my wife."

I laughed, "Like hell you do! You are very lucky, yet you treat Shelly like crap. Is that what I have to do? Treat a woman like crap to keep her interest? Because being nice and helpful and a friend just isn't cutting it."

"Hey," Shelly came over to us, she looked like she was having a good time. I was glad that someone was. "Come dance with me," she tugged on Travis' arm. Reluctantly, he allowed her to pull him out onto the dance floor. I watched them for a minute.

"Fuck this," I pushed away from the table and made my way over to where Billy and Cal were. "I'm going out there," I told Billy.

"Tanner don't," he called after me but I ignored him. "Wait for me then!"

By the time I stepped through the front doors, Billy had exhausted every excuse he had not to go check on them.

They weren't where I left them, they had moved further down the parking lot, down to here the Bastard's truck was parked. Billy and I made our way over there, hiding the best we could behind cars so they didn't see us.

"This is wrong," Billy hissed.

"Go back inside if you think that," I told him.

"Like I'm going to leave you out here by yourself, someone needs to talk sense into you if you go to do something stupid!"

"Whatever," I snapped. "Shut up, I'm trying to listen here!"

"Why don't we get out of here?" I heard the Bastard ask Sara.

"Fuck that," I whispered and went to get up.

"Tanner!" Billy grabbed my shirt, pulling me down again. "Just stay where you are, let Sara handle this."

"Fine," I snapped."

"No," Sara's voice was calm, which surprised me. "I'm not going anywhere with you Ken, I meant what I said, it's over between us. I don't want you to call me, I don't want you to come over unannounced, and I sure as hell don't want you to sing songs to me. Like that's going to change my mind!"

"Baby why are you being so damn difficult? I told you that I'm sorry and I won't do it again." I rolled my eyes, 'yeah right,' I whispered; Billy shh'ed me.

"You've said that a million times before too Ken but it still happened. I can't do that anymore, being with you isn't good for me, I need to put as much distance between us as possible."

"But I changed!" He exclaimed. "Sara I went to that anger management course that you've been bugging me about and I've even been seeing a shrink! I know what I did was wrong, I don't want to hurt you anymore. Please baby, just give me one more chance to show you how much you mean to me."

There was silence, not being able to see them was torture, I was imaging them kissing. Yes, the green eyed monster reared it's ugly head. "I'm looking," I told Billy.

"No," he pointed to himself. "I'll do it." I started to protest but he was already moving upward to look over the car we were hiding behind.

"No Ken," I grabbed Billy as Sara spoke again. "I've given you enough chances, too many in fact. I need to get on with my life and I'm sorry but you can't be a part of that life."

"Why not?" He demanded. "You said there would always be room in your life for me."

"That was a long time ago Ken!" Her patience sounded like it had reached its limit. "That was after the second time you hit me, I was stupid then, I'm not now. I don't deserve to be treated the way you treated me, I've finally realized that."

"Come on Sara, you know that you miss me. Who could love you like I do?"

I wanted to run over and kick him in the nuts - love? He didn't know what the hell love was.

Sara chuckled, "Thankfully no one will ever love me like you did. Your love damn near killed me Ken! I was to the point that I thought it would be better if I just let you finish the job too. You made me not want to live! That's not love, Ken, it's not."

"But I don't feel that way anymore, I have a lot to live for and even though my life isn't perfect I wouldn't miss a moment of it. I want to live Ken."

"You can still live," Ken insisted. "And you can do it with me baby. We could get married like you talked about -"

"YOU AREN'T LISTENING TO ME!" Sara yelled at him. "I DON'T WANT TO BE WITH YOU!"

"Calm down!" Ken ordered.

"Let me go," Sara cried out. I went to jump up but fucking Billy stopped me again.

"Fuck off!" I hissed.

"I said let me go Ken!" The level of panic in her voice rose.

"Fucking bastard, let her go!" I yelled out, shoving Billy away as I finally made it to a fully standing position. "Let her go!"

"Tanner what are you doing out here? I asked you to go inside!"

"What?" I was shocked. "You are mad at me? What the hell for? I'm not the one gripping your arm at the moment!"

"Just go inside!" She cried. "I need to do this myself! Just go inside!"

"No," I started for them but Billy caught my attention, he was motioning for me to leave. Sara didn't know that he was there.

"Just go Tanner please," she pleaded.

I didn't want too. I didn't know if Billy could handle the Bastard if he got violent but what else could I do?

It was the hardest decision I ever made in my life, leaving her out there in the bastard's grip. I was a nervous wreak as I sat staring at the door, waiting for someone to come in but for the longest time, no one did.

"Just go and see what's going on," I begged Cal after a half hour of waiting. "If the Bastard flips, Billy is going to get hurt," I tried to appeal to his attraction to Billy. "You wouldn't want anything to happen to him, would you?"

"No," Cal admitted. "But I don't think we have to worry about it, Billy is stronger than you think he is."

"Fuck, you suck!" I pushed away from the table, scanning the bar, wondering what the hell I was going to do.

I spotted Travis. "Excuse me," I damn near ran over to where my brother and his wife were sitting with a group of people that Shelly knew. "I need your help."

Travis didn't have any problems going out to see what was up, and that's why my brother is cool, he doesn't think, he reacts.

But ten minutes later, I was worried that he reacted too much. "I'm going out," I told Cal and left without waiting for him to say anything. I was halfway across the bar when Sara appeared at the entrance without Billy or my brother. Our eyes met, she looked terribly upset. I started to push through the crowd, not caring when I almost knocked one woman on her ass.

Sara though headed off in another direction. She headed for the stage. I paused, watching her, wondering what the hell she was doing.

Up on stage, Frankie was talking to the crowd, the band had just come back from a break so they were getting ready for the next person to go up but when Sara walked up onto the stage Frankie stopped to talk to her. When she turned back to the crowd, Frankie was grinning. "Well hell guys, it looks like it's our lucky night. Without any prompting, begging or pleading Sara has asked to do another song. What do you say?" She paused, "Do you all want to hear a little something from Sara?"

The whole room started cheering and hollering their excitement.

"I take that as a yes," Frankie laughed, turning to Sara who now held a mic in her hand - while Frankie was talking to the crowd, she had talked to the band. "I'm sure everyone would love to know how this miracle happened."

"Well Frankie...everyone," she smiled out over the crowd. "I feel happy and I want to celebrate."

When she said celebrate, I felt my heart sink, the Bastard had mentioned marriage...I didn't even want to think about it. I needed to get out of there.

I was on my way back to the table, to get my jacket and tell Cal I was leaving. Only Cal wasn't the only one at the table, Billy, Travis and Shelly were all there too. "Where the hell were you?"

"Shhhhh," Shelly pointed to the stage where Frankie had just asked Sara what it was that she was celebrating.

I turned to stage as Sara said, "The feeling of freedom..." she trailed off and then looked out over the crowd as the band started to play. "I guess you can say this is my Independence day!"

I shot Billy a questioning look when the crowd roared and Sara launched into the song.

"Well she seemed all right by dawn’s early light though she looked a little
Worried and weak she tried to pretend he wasn’t drinkin’ again but daddy left
The proof on her cheek and I was only eight years old that summer and I always
Seemed to be in the way so I took myself down to the fair in town on Independence day"

"Independence Day by Martina McBride," he told me and then added. "The crowd loves it when she sings Martina, she really gets into it."

I turned back to watch her, he was right, she did get into the song. Especially the chorus...

"Let freedom ring, let the white dove sing
Let the whole world know that today is a day of reckoning
Let the weak be strong, let the right be wrong
Roll the stone away, let the guilty pay, it’s independence day"

More than the one she sang before, it was like she was...

"What happened outside?" I asked Billy.

"Just like she said, today was a day of reckoning, the weak was strong."

"What the hell does that mean?"

Billy smiled, "It means that she is free, she's finally out from under his spell. And from what I heard, I don't think he'll be bothering her again - she totally emasculated him."

Guys Do It All The Time

My first thought was to jump to my feet, to force myself between Sara and the Bastard. By the way Billy jumped up, I assumed that was exactly what he was thinking too. Only we didn't get a chance to do that, Sara noticed our movement and gave both of us a look that pleaded that we'd back off. I didn't want too. I wanted to punch Bastard's lights out. How dare he interrupt us? How dare he grab her away from me when she was about to kiss me! Fucking Bastard!

But I respected her wishes, I didn't choke the life out of him. Instead, I watched him slide his hand down her arm, taking her hand in his as he leaned in to whisper in her ear. Oh Fuck! I swear to God I saw red, literally. There was this up roar in my head that drowned out the music from the band and a maniacal voice in my head was screaming 'kill the Bastard, Sara's your girl!' I had to take a couple deep breaths to stop from lunging at them.

Thankfully Sara yanked away from him, shaking her head as she stared up at him. He leaned in again, his hands were going for her waist but she stopped him, her hands shot out, wrapping around his wrists.

"I said no!" She shouted while shoving his hands away from her. Without another word, she spun around and took off. I lost track of her in the crowd but later found out she high tailed it to the bathroom.

The Bastard watched her walk away until she disappeared, then he turned, glancing at everyone at the table until he came to me. He stood there with his hands in his pockets, staring at me - I stared back, there was no way I was going to be the first one to look away. Hell no, not when he knew exactly what he interrupted.

He was the first to look away but before he did, I swear I saw a gleam in his eyes, as if he didn't think I was that much of a challenge, that Sara wouldn't hold out from doing whatever it was he wanted for too long because of me. I continued to glare at him as he walked away with a smug smile on his face. And Fuck! I wanted to slap that fucker off.

Once he was gone, Billy told me that he was worried that Sara would go back to the Bastard; they had broken up before but some how Bastard always managed to talk his way back into her life. "Not this time," I told him. "Not if I have anything to say about it!"

A half hour later Sara finally came back to the table, she didn't look at anyone as she returned to the spot she was standing in before karaoke started and sipped on the water on the table in front of her. "You OK?"

Slowly she placed her glass back down on the table, she tilted her head to look at me. She smiled grimly and nodded her head.

I slipped to the edge of my stool, my hand gently resting on her shoulder blade. "Are you still nervous?"

She laughed, really laughed. "Yes," she nodded with a smile on her lips. "I'm shaking," she held her hand out for me to see. "I can't stop it."

I took her hand in mine, pulling her closer once again. "You'll be great," I told her as Frankie took the stage after the guy who was attempting to sing some country song finally finished, she thanked him and then called Sara up. "This is it," I kissed her cheek. "Go show them how it's done." Then, as an after thought, I asked her what she was singing.

"Guys do it all the time," she left to make her way onto the stage.

I turned to Billy, told him what she was singing and asked what it was. "It's by Mindy McCready," he informed me. When I stared at him blankly, he added, "It's country. Haven't you ever heard of her?"

"Country?" I groaned, "Why does she have to do country? Why can't she sing some real songs?"

Billy rolled his eyes, "Tanner this whole night is country, didn't Sara tell you?"

"No!" I cringed. A whole night of country? Did I die and go to hell? I went to ask Billy but he wasn't paying attention to me anymore he was watching Sara as she walked onto the stage, looking like she was about to puke in the middle of it.

The whole room seemed like it stopped, a quick look around told me that everyone was watching her - I felt nervous for her. She smiled shyly, jumping slightly when the band started playing the music. The first beat from the drum, everything changed, the Sara that walked away from me seemed to disappear and in her place was a confident woman who gave the audience everything they could've wanted. At one point she slipped a cowboy hat off one of the guys standing in front of the stage and slipped it on her head without missing a beat - or word. I was so shocked at the transformation in her that I didn't even realize that I missed the whole song until the bar erupted in wolf whistles and applause, they loved her. And so did I.

"Thank you," she laughed as she returned the guy's hat to him. "You guys are awesome!"

"Sara always introduces the next act," Billy whispered when Frankie didn't go up onto the stage but the music for the next person started.

"Oh!" Sara exclaimed as she looked off to the right of the stage but there was only Frankie there, she was giving her some kind of signal, she didn't look too happy. "Well this is a rare one," Sara turned back to us. "Not often guys attempt this song on this stage - and it's my favorite! Rascal Flatt's 'What Hurts The Most'."

Across the table from me, Billy sat up straight, looking around frantically. "No way," he said in disbelief over and over again while he scanned the crowd.

"What's wrong?"

"No, no, no, no, no!" He must have spotted who he was looking for, jumped off his stool, and disappeared into the crowd as he made his way to the stage.

On stage Sara looked lost. "Well, I don't know who's singing this one," she laughed. "Come on, don't be -" she must've saw Billy for she asked him if he was doing this song.

Billy shook his head and pointed behind her, she turned around and froze as the Bastard joined her on the stage. He smiled down at her as he wrapped his hand around hers on the mic, "No baby," he chuckled. "This one is mine."

This time people around me were silent but it didn't feel like the way they were when Sara took the stage, you could feel the tension, it was crazy.

The band faltered but Frankie was frantically giving them signs to go on.

As Sara stood frozen, staring up at the Bastard he tugged her and the mic closer to him as he started to sing her favorite song directly to her.

I had to look up the lyrics because I don't know the song....fucker. That's all I have to say. Fucking Bastard.

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

The whole time he sang right to her, until she snapped out of her frozen state at the 'walk away' part but he didn't let her go.

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

Sara moved one way, he let her get a couple steps before he was back in front of her. Then she tried the other way, he did the same thing until she just stood there once again. Staring up at him, this time she wasn't frozen, she looked mad but there were tears in her eyes.
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

This time, when he got to the 'walk away' part, she shoved him and managed to run off the stage - straight for our table.

"Sara," I tried to talk to her but she held up her hands and screamed 'no' as she grabbed her jacket and ran towards the front doors.

The Bastard finished the song, dropped the mic on the stage and took off after her.